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Lost Lake

The pain of your heart rises up

like a snow-capped mountain,

incomprehensibly big against the pale blue sky.

You have walked those ridges before --

long days and nights stumbling around the boulders and brambles;

walked until your feet were calloused and bloody

and iced over from the cold.

You have watched forest fires ravage these peaks

as you stood helpless and small

in the crackling orange blaze.

You have laid down in the beds of ash that followed,

running your blistered hands among the blackened remains

and choking out salt water

until the air was too dry to speak

and your body was too tired to walk any further.

….But do you remember it is okay to rest?

Do you?

Do you remember the place where mountaintop ice melts into a slow, trickling stream?

Follow it down

over the cracked rocks and fallen tree trunks

of your heart,

until the air begins to warm

and the stream begins to rush with more certainty.

Follow it down

and eventually you will find a Lost Lake.

(Maybe it was lost, or you, but it doesn’t matter now).

Go to the place where the lake waters gently sigh against the earthy shore.

Sit.

Run your fingers through this soft, forgotten soil

and let the mud be a welcome mat to your grateful toes.

Be still, there.

And when you are ready,

wade deep into the water

until you find yourself resting in the middle of your own cupped hands.

Let yourself be held there.

Let the breeze remind you

how it feels to float.

Let the water remind you

how it feels to dance,

to laugh.

Look up now at your pain that rises in the distance,

still swelling and aching towards the sky.

From down here

do you remember

how kind of marvelous it is?

Kateri Boucher lives in Detroit/ Waawiyatanong ‒ “where the water goes around.”

She served in Boston as a Quaker Voluntary Service Fellow from 2017 to 2018. She is the Ministries Coordinator at St. Peter’s Episcopal Church, a Master’s of Divinity Student at United Theological Seminary of the Twin Cities, and the grateful caretaker of an opinionated tabby cat named Lucy.