Report on Among Western Friends, an online conversation

By Jay Thatcher (Western Friend Board Member) with comment opportunity for Development and Outreach

November 19, 2025

Aware of independent Friends long reticence to articulate our faith or practice, and noticing a recent sizeable influx of new attenders and visitors at several meetings, the Development & Outreach Committee of the Western Friend board convened an online conversation in October. We called it Among Western Friends: What a new attender needs to know.

Sixty people came. We appeared to be a mix of people with experience and an interest in the topic, and people seeking answers – perhaps as new attenders. We expected some questions such as:

∙ How is this different from other churches?

∙ What else does a meeting do besides sit in silence?

∙ If I have an idea or a need, whom should I ask?

∙ When do I speak in worship?

∙ Is there some core belief or practice that’s essential?

From those who were seeking good ways of encouraging newcomers, the wonderings included:

∙ What do new attenders want or need to know?

∙ What’s a good book or pamphlet to offer?

∙ Who has a great handout to offer someone there for the first time?

The conversation included reflections from two fairly new attenders, discussion in small groups and reports to the larger body. There is enough interest that the committee is planning to offer another online conversation and perhaps some other resources, such as articles, in person conversation, a mailing list or an online treasure chest of good handouts and welcoming letters.

A survey of Friends who attended in October has yielded comments such as:

• A lot of the suggestions were things we already do. Confirmation of doing the right thing is a good thing to hear.
• We are ageing out and need ideas on drawing in younger people.
• We have many newer attenders who are not ready or inclined to seek Membership.
• People in the group offered a variety of ways to engage with newcomers, ranging from:
• informal person to person interactions in small meetings,
• regular discussions for everyone that are conducive to newcomer exploration,
• social time at meeting largely devoted to answering questions and assisting newcomers in feeling welcome, to
• regular social gatherings for newcomers.
• I really appreciated the reminder to ASK new attenders what they need.
• I could use more guidance on how to open a conversational space and listen to a newcomer’s story.
• A woman told our small group that she had no idea how she wound up in the Zoom conversation, while admitting that she was curious about Quakers. At the end of the small group time she announced that she was absolutely going to find a Quaker meeting and go as soon as possible!